Back when my friend Jeff brought that group of men to my church, one of the question asked was "with the same service being done every week, week after week, how do you grow?"
My answer was that I'm still working on the first Beattitude, that once I get that one down I'll move on to the next. And I said something about being transformed by the Holy Mystery. But I wish I had said something about the Orthodox not having to rely so much on Sunday because of the life-style we live.
I should have said that every day we read the prescibed passages from the Bible, and that we say the Morning Prayers and the Evening Prayers. And if we grow beyond that, we can add the daily readings from Prologue, and pray the 1st, 3rd, 6th, and 9th Hours. And if that isn't enough we can pray Vespers, Compline, Matins and the other services at home. And if we have grown beyond that we can add reading the lives of the saints to our daily practices. And if we have gained everything possible from the Wednesday and Friday fasts we can fast on Monday, too. And if that isn't enough, we can forswear meat completely. And if we think we've grown to that place where we can breathe prayer, we can become hesychasts and pray without ceasing.
But me? I have not progressed to the place where I can benefit from more. At least I don't think I have. I am confident that if I started praying the Hours every day I would very quickly become bloated with ugly pride and tell everyone I know that I am praying the Hours. I'm still struggling with the basics, such as loving my neighbors and forgiving my enemies. Shoot! I'd be happy if I could just remember to check what day it is before I put cream in my coffee. That's hard enough for me.
As for my health issues, I just talked to my doctor. He says I am suffering from severe degenerative disc disease. It is painful but not life threatening. No course of treatment has been decided. Need more tests. Oh, regarding my heart: They don't know yet. I have tests comming up. I've always been good at tests, so I'm sure everything will be okay.
1 day ago
3 comments:
Because we come to a place where we learn *more* from the Liturgy. And, then we don't and then all of a sudden we do. Or I do anyway.
This is indeed a test to do well on, dear Matt! Continued prayers.
Thanks for this post Matt, I appreciate it. I will not tell you where I am on this list of spiritual development except to tell you I forswore meat at age 13, was advised to eat meat again at 22, and am now back to my natural state of affairs, thanks to the grace of God...and that I have been discussing the Jesus Prayer and the Philokalia...and perhaps this is in part responsible for the decline of my marriage, my lack of respect for my natural state of affairs. I was thinking about you today as I was making tomato minestrone soup from my vegan cookbook. I like how you posted your recipe, and I may do the same soon.
In Christ
Olympiada
Praying for you Matt.
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