Almost Melt Down

Last night after dropping of pictures of my Mom at my sister's house (for the video at the memrial service) I went to the local Target to pick up a couple of things for my son Billy in Afghanistan. (We have to mail Christmas presents early for them to get there in time.) My son Basil was with me. Looking at all of the Christmas decorations (you know, snow globes, ribbon, bronze stag heads, Santas, stockings, fancy plates and glasses, ornaments, wreaths, etc.) Basil kept saying "Pretty, Daddy, pretty." And I was thinking of my son in Afghanistan, and my son Devon who I haven't seen in almost two years but who is comming to his Granny's memorial service, and my son Anselm who can't hear, and that Christmas is my mother's favorite holiday, how in the hot summer she would play Christmas records.... And I started weeping right there on the stationary aisle. I got it under control, but it was a little unsettling. I don't usually do stuff like that. Maybe I'm not getting enough sleep.