Viva Las Vegas

Kathleen and I got home yesterday from three nights and four days in Las Vegas. Here is my evaluation of the trip.

Rating the various parts of my Las Vegas adventure on a scale of 1 to 10

A. San Francisco International Airport. Easy parking, fun conveyor belt rides. Really neat museum quality exhibit on the history of flight attendant uniforms. Loses points for the Harvey Milk exhibit. SCORE: 6

B. Southwest Airlines. On time. No fee for luggage!!!! SCORE: 10

C. Uber. Always there when you need them. One driver was on crank. All the others were great. I think one lady is converting to Orthodoxy. SCORE: 9.5

D. Staying at a Blue-Green Vacations resort for 3 nights for free. No daily maid service because of covid wasn't as big a bummer as I thought it would be. Comfortable beds, full kitchen including place settings and cookware. All the C-Span channels and the Weather Channel!!! Upgraded to the deluxe sweet because of my job. They would score higher if they had a better pool. SCORE: 9

E. Church of St. Paul the Apostle. They had a fill in priest because their regular priest was on vacation and there was a medical emergency during the service (a teenage girl passed out at the start of the Gospel reading) but the subdeacon was on the ball! Even paramedics coming into the church to help the girl didn't throw him off his stride. I don't know his name is but every parish should have a subdeacon or deacon like him. He was managing the acolytes, relying instructions to the choir director, and anticipating the needs of the priest so that the priest and people could do their jobs smoothly. It is always enjoyable to watch someone working who is really good at his job. This church gets bonus points because every word chanted, spoken, or sung was annunciated clearly, loudly, and at a speed a normal person can interpret as human language. I am no fan of the speed reading style of liturgizing so I loved this service. (I can't assign a number rating to The Orthodox Church)

F. The Casinos at Caesar's Palace and the Bellagio. What is up with all the loud pop music? I wouldn't listen to that dreck at sensible volume but when it is so loud you have to speak at an unusual decibel level to be heard by the person standing beside you it is too loud. Even if I had wanted to gamble I wouldn't have because of the noise level. At least, they were clean and didn't smell like smoke. SCORE: 3

G. The staff members at Caesar's Palace and the Bellagio. Very helpful. Very friendly. Very efficient. If I were doing a case study for a degree in hospitality management I would use these people as examples of what to do right. SCORE 10

H. Fremont Street (aka The Old Strip). Clouds of Marijuana smoke and crowds of drunk people. Street performers with carefully placed electrical tape engaged in simulated sex acts. Again, overly loud music. On the plus side, there are zip lines and a street long over-head electronic art thing. SCORE: 2

I. The Miracle Mile. It's just a shopping mall but the interior architecture fools you into thinking you are outside in old Algiers or Casablanca It is very convincing. Score: 7

J. Oscar's in the dome of the Plaza Hotel. WOW WHAT A STEAK!!!! I thought I had had food before but I was wrong. I'm going to say something I never thought I would say, but the steaks here are better than the steaks at Harris's Restaurant in San Francisco. SCORE: 10

K. Leather Throwers exhibit at the Bellagio Gallery of Fine Art. The quality of the exhibit was very good. Works by Andy Warhol, Louis Vuitton, and Jeffry Gibson shown together with promotional posters, boxing gloves, and other items from Las Vegas' history with boxing shine light and love on the Sweet Science. The only complaint: It was excellent quality that made me wish for more quantity. The exhibit was too small. You can see the whole thing in an hour. Score: 7

L. Montecristo cigar bar at Caesar's Palace. Wide selection. Knowledgeable staff. Comfortable chairs. Quiet. They didn't have Punch Robustos but they found a cigar for me with a similar flavor profile. SCORE: 9

M. The Cabanas at the Bellagio Pools. Absolutely marvelous. Water. Sun. Quiet. Pleasant people. Friendly helpful staff. Excellent food. Very good place to spend a day and take a nap. We got our cabana away from the big main pools but near one of the side pools that more resembbles a Roman fountain. Beautiful and peaceful. SCORE: 10

N. The Absinthe show at Caesar's Palace. The acrobatic and arial acts were amazing, and I say that without an ounce of hyperbole. I had never seen people so physically strong before. Sadly, their performances were undermined by less than salubrious adolescent humour that wasn't funny and left me feeling polluted. Score: 5

O. The Rat Pack is Back show at the Tuscany Casino. Singers impersonating Frank Sinatra, Dean Martin, and Sammy Davis Jr. doing their act from the Sands in the 1960. The guy doing Sinatra was very good. The guy doing Martin was spot on when it came to voice but engaged in some vulgarisms Dean Martin wouldn't have. During That's Amore he stopped singing and let the audience sing. We all knew the words. It was a fun moment. Sadly, the singer who impersonated Sammy Davis Jr was all personality but had very little of Davis' singing ability. Or, maybe, he was over-acting. It is as though he let Davis' cool cat persona overtake and distort Davis' very great musicianship. The orchestra was very good. Score: 8

P. McCarran Airport. I liked the exhibits on the history of the Airport (Who remembers Bonanza Airline?) The gift shops had a wide variety of merchandise to choose from. The seating at the gate could have been better. Getting though security was a breeze. The biggest drawback was the quality of the food at the PGA cafe in the terminal. Starbuck's on the other side of the hall would have been better. Score: 8